I love going to see my dentist with his wicked sense of humour. On my last visit he said that nothing had changed from last time, so make sure I eat more sugar and don’t brush. 

During the cleaning he asked if I was OK. I tried to mumble something to the affirmative unable to talk, as you are, with your mouth full of equipment. 

Then he said: “You know I really couldn’t care less about whether you are distressed. It’s not my pain. I’m just trying to look like I’m being polite.”

In reality, he always makes time to see you when you are in distress and is no-nonsense, skilled and efficient. In past years, he’s even given me his mobile number during a dental crisis just prior to planned open heart surgery.