I woke up recently to discover that a talent I had once shared with oysters had vanished.

No longer could I transform the unending irritations of GP life into pearls.

My ability had been swept away in the currents generated from the unending stream of numbers flowing out of my downloaded Google authenticator.

The 2.5 hours I had spent unsuccessfully trying to log into the new AHPRA portal had left me with slimy innards and dripping mucous, feeling decidedly lacklustre.