The doctor is out - but we have this magic 8-ball

I’ve often wondered if I could be replaced by a magic 8-ball. Or whether my patients would mind if half way through my consult I said “hang on a moment” and then shake my 8-ball for some advice. I’ve always wondered whether it would do me any good or just make my patients extremely afraid of me? 

But some of the statements on the 8-ball seem remarkably similar to what I often advise! I thought I’d compare some of my practice over the past week with the sage-like advice of my magic 8-ball. 

Outlook not so good -